Monday, March 5, 2007
Suicide for the manly
Well, seeing that the tutorials are piling up, and tests are round the corner... stress builds...
Your girlfriend/boyfriend dumped you? No supporters even though you want to run for council. Feel as though nobody understands you? And you'd be better off dead? Well, you probably are...
Well, cutting wrists? Nah too messy... Stepping in front of the MRT at Bishan? bleh... BORING...
Jumping off a building? Sheesh, be more creative can't you?
Well, here's a list on how to kill yourself in the manliest ways i can think of...
1) Self decapitation with a razor blade
required items: razor blade, your neck
Heard of the phrase," down the highway and not across the street?" well S#$%@ that, razor blade right through the neck's the way to go.
2) Swim across the singapore river with cement shoes
required items: Singapore river, a sack of 10 kg cement
Do it Capone style, take a dip in the singapore river with some cement shoes, if you still survive, apply to join the olympics for the long distance swimming event, or add more cement, your choice...
3) Jump of a 50 meter HDB flat with a 40 meter steel cord around your neck
required items: Any old HDB flat which is at least 50 meters tall, 40 meters of premium steel cable, your neck, preferably a crowd waiting below, a post on the roof to secure the wire to.
Tie the steel cable to the pole, and the other end around your neck, jump and watch it rain blood.
I'll post more when i can think of em... (warning, do not really try this, i'm just joking)
Labels: suicide manly
Posted by Chu Ming at 5:22 PM
